So if we're here to BECOME healthy, chances are we weren't (or aren't) healthy to begin with, or at the very least less healthy.
I don't know why this took so long to click!
I wasn't eating well. I wasn't treating my body well. I wasn't moving. Yet for some reason I thought I would be able to jump right into eating right and exercising.
This is no doubt my down fall every. Single. Time.
I've been INCREDIBLY close to quitting again in the past few weeks. The same cycle is so close to repeating itself:
1) Realize how terrible I look and feel.
2) Sign up for WW (because it ALWAYS works!)
3) Start! Be really excited about my new journey!!
4) Kick some major booty staying super OP.
5) Lose "X" lbs (in this case 40.)
6) Gain for two weeks in a row for the first time.
7) Hate myself and eat. And eat. And eat. Then eat some more.
8) Yo-yo weight for a few weeks while I tell myself I'm a failure once again.
10) Gain all (or more) of my weight back.
Then start all over again.
I'm done with that. I'm starting over NOW before I get to steps 9 and 10.
I made a list of foods I LOVE. I noticed that a lot of the things I tend to eat when I'm OP are not on the list, and some things that I never eat are on the list. So part of my starting over is that I'm only going to eat foods that I LOVE. If I don't absolutely love it, it's not going in my mouth.
I'm also going to focus on listening to my body tell me I'm full. Let me tell you, I have tried intuitive eating. This is NOT what I'm talking about. I have much too little self control around certain foods (binge triggers) to eat intuitively, it's simply stopping when comfortably full, instead of stuffed beyond belief!
I am going to do this for a week or two, and then try adding exercise back in. I will NOT go balls to the wall like I've tried to do so many times in the past. I will start with 10-20 minutes three times a week. I can commit to that. I will quit if I try to push it.
I will also keep up this blog. I honestly don't even care so much if it gets read or not. Just something about putting it out there where anyone can see it helps to keep me accountable. I feel like it will keep me from quitting. I need it to keep me from quitting.
So there is my big bad Thursday post! I'm back. And I CAN do this.
FYI: the photo is from a beach trip this year. Isn't it so serene?